An Unexpected Benefit

As my body declines and my need for help increase we have had to hire outside help to aid reduce the burden on Stephanie. So far we've been extraordinarily lucky to have found great people in our circle of acquaintance. Up until very recently the help has been all female, which has been kind of a departure from the status quo around here. Having raised three boys our house has been kind of sausage heavy with poor Stephanie being the sole representative of her gender having any significant presence in the day to day of the house. Now that situation is turned somewhat on its head., I am the one outnumbered.

In my life I have had a few girlfriends, but really I have had only one close female friend and I'm married to her. To be sure, I have many female acquaintances, many of whom I am quite fond of some even fairly close but for me the bar is pretty high as far as who I call my friend for this post. Having worked in a heavily male dominated industry my whole career (Information Technology) I had virtually no female coworkers and anyway, maybe I was cautious or even immature, but chumming around with the ones that were there didn't feel right as I was married.

Now my day is dominated by women. Odds are that any given day a woman gets me up in the morning and turns out my light at night. I find myself really enjoying their company. I really had no idea that I was missing out, I did not consciously segregate myself, heck I even was fairly close to some I thought. I just now find myself enjoying the little differences women seem to bring to my day. The different way they approach thing, the energy they bring. It's cool and different.

Now that I am a total wreck physically and no woman would be interested or even able, I guess I'm letting my guard down too.  I got especially close to one of our caregivers (who unfortunately for me but awesome for her has moved on to bigger and better things) and one day we were messing around with a goofy app on her phone making silly pet videos. It was about then that it hit me, holy crap, she's kinda my friend. It was an odd feeling for me. Now, as I said, I'm a wreck so we're not going to get beers or anything and yep we totally paid her to hang with me , but yeah I have a friend who happens to be a girl. Go figure.

The point of this screed is not to say I actually understand the complexities of the female gender or that I have a understanding of what it's like to be a woman. Those remain as inscrutable as ever.  What it is, however, is an appreciation for the three wonderful ones that have been helping me in more ways than they realize. Thank you seems insufficient. but I am saying it anyway.